Just remind yourself that pain is unmanliness leaving the body.

Just remind yourself that pain is unmanliness leaving the body.

 

One of the most widely held beliefs of what constitutes manliness throughout recorded history has been the notion that the more hair one has, the more manly one is.

Well, that may have been true during the time period when cavemen and dinosaurs were cavorting about and playing Jenga together, but it no longer holds true.

In fact, these days, you can abscond with the hair from anywhere on your body and still hold onto your Man Card.

Because these days, less is more.

Hair on your head? That’s a good thing.

Hair on your chest? Chest hair makes the perfect padding for natural protection against jousting mishaps. (If you’re into that sorta thing.)

Hair on your man parts? Well, you did reach puberty, didn’t you?

Hair on your legs and arms? Hell, that’s part and parcel of any decent birthday suit.

But seriously? Back hair is not manly – It’s apely.

And unless your goal is to look like a damned dirty ape, a primal knuckle dragging creature that has no social life whatsoever, then you might want to plow that back forty with some clippers, a blow torch, chainsaw – somethin’ right about now.

Because, while it does show off your ability to grow hair, that is about the only true benefit it offers.

And lest you think it makes you more attractive to women you’d really want to date, these kind of women secretly throw up in their mouths a little bit anytime they see enough back hair on a man to make an area rug out of.

So, do yourself and everyone else who has to look at your back a favor and get rid of your hair apparent immediately.