There’s No Such Thing As Imitation Crab Meat
This is a message to all you sushi restaurant owners, sushi chefs and waiters and waitresses out there who work at sushi restaurants who like to pretend that imitation crab meat in any way, shape, or form, in ANY WAY resembles or tastes like actual crab meat....
They Are Women, Hear Them Roar
A funny thing happened the day after the inauguration of the 45th President of the United States Of America on Friday, January 20th, 2017. More specifically, the American people decided to show up in literally DROVES the day AFTER the inauguration of the new POTUS....
Aaron Rodgers Is A God In Football Pads
If you saw what Aaron Rodgers did to the Dallas Cowboys, you now know what many football fans know to be true: Aaron Rodgers is simply not human. Arguably the greatest quarterback to ever step on a football field. Yeah, that’s right. You heard me. Even better than...
The Skinny on Skinny Jeans And Manliness
If Bruce Lee, Batman, Steve McQueen, Vin Diesel, John Wick, Jason Momoa, James Harrison, Indiana Jones, Diego Sanchez, Chase Utley, Jason Statham, Luke Cage, Aaron Rogers, not only couldn’t pull off skinny jeans, not to mention ever even be caught dead in them, then...
Happy Do Over
People say Happy New Year at the beginning of every new year, as if to try to cover up what the actual true meaning is behind it. That true meaning? Well, that is best summed up by just calling what it is: A do over. Another 365 chances for you to finally get your...
Black Friday Is For Suckers
If you have a sausage and cabbages and you participate in Black Friday Sales in any way, shape, or form, other than online shopping, you may as well just hand your Man Card over right now. Why? Surely you jest. That shit is shopping. You can try to qualify it...
Why Fantasy Football Sucks
I love football, but I hate Fantasy Football. Here’s why. This season was my 3rd year playing. The first two years, I had a losing record. I sucked and the other guys in the league tried to convince me that because of how many points I scored, I was still having a...
With All Due Apologies To Actual Big Beautiful Women
This is a very misleading term that I’ve found is usually used by fat women who are not beautiful. Personally, I love women with some meat on their bones. Curves are sexy. A round, bulbous inviting ass is all I need to get me in the mood to make the beast with two...
In Praise Of Extra Tight Leggings
I don’t know who invented those tight, luminous, body hugging pieces of heaven, but if I ever do, I plan to kiss them full on the mouth. If you don’t see the appeal and you’re straight, just ask your penis.
Thanks For Nothing Pale Face
Thanksgiving might be fun and enjoyable for the average American, but for the average Native American? Not so much. Every Thanksgiving Day in these United States of America, hundreds of Native people from around the country gather at Cole’s Hill, which overlooks...
The Best Ink Pens Little Money Can Buy
As a scribe, even in this high-tech world of laptops and tablets, where the need to actually “write” anything has gone the way of the word processor, from time to time, putting pen to paper actually does become necessary. When that happens, make sure you...
Put The List Ease App On Your List
If there’s one thing I hate, perhaps more than anything else, it’s shopping. In fact, I hate it so much, I don’t shop. I buy. Meaning, I know what I want before I set foot in a store. When I find something I can use to help me get in and out of stores faster, I’m all...
Chain Restaurants Are Why God Invented Yelp
What’s my number one pet peeve with my fellow human beings when it comes to culinary pursuits? Hey, thanks for asking! That’s an easy one. I absolutely hate the fact that people who, when they travel out of town for business or pleasure, instead of...
Leftovers Are Like A Manly Food Circus For Your Taste Buds
There’s only one thing better than freshly prepared food. That one thing? Day old or older freshly prepared food. You GOTTA love it. Seriously. It’s all about the chemistry involved. Foods that taste better the 2nd day or later taste that way because the ingredients...
Edward Snowden Is A Hero
If you think Edward Snowden is a traitor, you’re not paying attention. This guy risked his career, his reputation, his life, and perhaps most importantly, a PRIME piece of ass to tell us what the U.S. Government is doing when we’re not looking. You might think that’s...
Chick Fil-A French Fries
Chick Fil-A chicken is very good chicken. However, their chicken pales in comparison to their fries. Honestly, I can take or leave their chicken. Their fries on the other hand? When served piping hot and eaten right away, their fries are Last Meal Death Row Good.
Arby’s Has The Meats
Arby’s is one company and brand that gets it. They know their customer, what their customers want, and what to say to their customers to keep them coming back for more. Their ad campaign, featuring a VO with a knowing take on “Marcellus Wallace” the character...
Why Mark Zuckerberg Named Facebook.com, Facebook.com.
Because lookatme.com was already taken.